Sunday, September 18, 2011

Conan........the Professor.....

     After a tough life which started when the ruthless warlord Thulsa Doom destroyed his village and killed his parents, Conan was bent on a life of revenge.  After many years of being confined to the Wheel of Pain, and many more years of earning the job title, "the Barbarian"  (duties which comprised mainly of crushing his enemy, seeing them driven before him, and hearing the lamentations of the know, the typical Barbarian job role),  it was refreshing to see Conan was granted a tenure track position as a professor... at least according to a website for Trinity College in Dublin, Ireland that was hacked....

Conan's Ph. D dissertation is entitled, "To Hear The Lamentation of Their Women: Constructions of Masculinity in Contemporary Zamoran Literature”.  Conan and was appointed to the School of English in 2006.

Conan's full Curriculum Viate  is as follows: 

Dr Conan T. Barbarian, B.A.(Cimmeria) Ph.D. (UCD). F.T.C.D.
Long Room Hub Associate Professor in Hyborian Studies and Tyrant Slaying.
Dr Conan T. Barbarian was ripped from his mother’s womb on the corpse-strewn battlefields of his war-torn homeland, Cimmeria, and has been preparing for academic life ever since. A firm believer in the dictum that “that which does not kill us makes us stronger,” he took time out to avenge the death of his parents following a sojourn pursuing his strong interest in Post-Colonial theory at the Sorbonne. In between, he spent several years tethered to the fearsome “Wheel of Pain”, time which he now feels helped provide him with the mental discipline and sado-masochistic proclivities necessary to sucessfully tackle contemporary critical theory. He completed his PhD, entitled “To Hear The Lamentation of Their Women: Constructions of Masculinity in Contemporary Zamoran Literature” at UCD and was appointed to the School of English in 2006, after sucessfully decapitating his predecessor during a bloody battle which will long be remembered in legend and song. In 2011/12, he will be teaching on the following courses: “The Relevance of Crom in the Modern World”, “Theories of Literature”, “Vengeance for Beginners”, “Deciphering the Riddle of Steel” and “D.H. Lawrence”. He strongly objects to the terms of the Croke Park agreement and the current trend for remaking 1980s films that he believes were perfectly good enough in the first place.
He is happy to hear from potential research students with an interest of any of these topics, but applicants should note that anyone found guilty of academic misconduct or weakness

Unfortunately, the days of Conan the Professor (and the website that supported such a claim) are over, as the hacked site has since been taken down by the web administrators of Trinity College.  Still it would have been a great experience to learn proper MLA formatting and style from this guy.    

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